Post Blue
by coluhrs
Summary: "Oh you know," he shrugs, his voice light and airy despite the savage look in his eyes, "a bit of murder, a bit of mayhem, our special thing." / Sirius Black/OFC


She just wants to sleep.

That's all she wants. To sleep. She wants to close her eyes and lose it all. She wants to make it stop. The images. The sounds. The smells. She wants it out of her head. She can't escape it, She can't fight it. It's just there.

Veneda Phillips wasn't made for fighting wars, but here she was with her wand out ready to shoot an Unforgivable curse at anyone who threatened her loved ones. Veneda has sworn that she would never shoot an Unforgivable at anyone, until now. She had killed two Death Eaters in one night. Death Eaters! The epitome of low - but Veneda couldn't help but feel a big quilty. The Death Eaters had families, loved ones that they would never see again. Even though Veneda knew she had probably saved more lives than the ones she had taken away, she couldn't help but feel like a cold blooded murderer.

Veneda fell back at the impact of the blast from Bellatrix and Mrs. Weasley's duel. They were going at it pretty strong and Molly was refusing the aid of anyone who tried to help. She wanted to finish this woman - if you could even call such a monster that - off herself.

"Mum!" Ginny cries as she jumped up after her own fall.

It took a moment for Veneda's head to stop spinning before getting back to her feet. She scanned the room for Ginny, finding her just as Bellatrix sent her flying backwards again with a simple wave of her wand. Molly was livid and charged towards Bellatrix. She tried to retaliate by throwing everything she had at her but Bellatrix was just too strong. The witch threw another Killing Curse and, this time, it hit directly over Molly's heart.

Molly's body went stiff, her eyes bulging as she had a small moment of clarity before toppling over. She lands with a thump, her eyes still wide open and lifeless, and aimed right at Ginny. Voldemort turns and looks, letting out an uproarious laugh as he blasts Kingsley, McGonagall and Slughorn backward.

Shit.

"Mum! No!" Ginny gasps as her hands flew to her mouth letting out a scream of rage as she charges forward with her wand out, aiming it at Bellatrix.

Ginny tries to run further but her brother, Charlie, grabs her before she could and carries her kicking and screaming from the Great Hall.

"Ginny!" Veneda yells out after her closest friend; but she was gone. Her heart is breaking for her friend. She races down towards the end of the Great Hall, sidestepping around the fallen bodies. The bodies of people she'd grown up with. People who she'd grown to love. There was Remus Lupin, a member of the order and his wife Tonks.

Although what stuns her the most was the corpse of Hermione Granger -who'd been in the year above her. Hermione had always been kind to Veneda, she wasn't all that close with her but she'd always helped Veneda when she was confused with Potions as she had done it the year prior. Her hair settles around her head wildly and she was clutching her wand in one hand. She didn't look frightened; instead she had a wild, ferocious look in her eye.

"Hermione!"

Veneda turns to see Ron running towards her, well, Hermione.

"Ron! Your … your girlfriend! I … I'm sor -"

It's a curious thing, the death of a loved one. We all know that our time in this world is limited, and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more step than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things.

Veneda wants to cry, but she couldn't. She just stole a glance at Ron and then Hermione and then back at Ron with a solemn expression. How was Hermione gone? She had so many dreams that I knew she would succeed but now she was dead. Nothing could change that.

"Veneda, I know. I saw," he said, cutting her off as he tried to hold back his tears as he let out a loud estranged laugh, "It's bloody ridiculous."

Veneda rolls her eyes, throwing her hands up in defeat. "Oh, well _my_ bad then. I must have missed what was so funny about the mass murder of our fellow wizards."

"This is rubbish, I never got to tell Hermione that I was in love with her. Fuck!" He screams loudly as he latches onto his hair and pulls. Veneda stares at him in shock.

"Where's Harry?" She quicklys asks in means of changing the subject.

"I don't know. Where's Voldemort?"

They both scan the Great Hall, their eyes not stopping until they found Voldemort and Harry looking at each other. They slowly began to circle one another.

Ron was just about to run to him when Harry loudly announced, "I don't want anyone else to try to help." Ron halted. "It's got to be like this. It's got to be me."

It suddenly disgusts her, the idea of two people going to duel. Duel to death.

Veneda spun on her heel, She hated this. Veneda was not afraid of death; she just didn't want to be there when it happened. She pushes past the people that she recognized and stumbled back when she hears someone talking about her, "That's her," Neville says pointing at Veneda, "Well, apparently, her Dad is like, a huge Death Eater Voldy Freak."

Veneda cringes at his use of 'Voldy' and calmly walks past Neville murmuring, "You wanker, you remind me of him." Neville stares at her and tilts his head downwards towards the floor so they don't make eye contact.

She pushes her thin hair out of my face and wipes the sweat of her forehead with the back of her left hand and tromps down the all too familiar hall in search of Ginny.

Dumbledore. She skids to a stop when she spotted him. Maybe Dumbledore can help. Veneda begins walking faster in the means of catching up to him, "Professor!" Veneda calls out and the old man turns and smiles at her, beckoning Veneda to come forward. She races down the hallway towards him.

"Miss Phillips - "Professor Dumbledore began but was cut off by a loud scream of terror. Someone had died.

Veneda smiles, perhaps Voldemort had died but Veneda's heart dropped when she heard another scream, "Harry! Oh god, Harry!"

Harry Potter wasn't supposed to die, he was the boy who lived. Or now he was the boy who lived long enough to try and defeat Voldemort. Veneda thinks about Harry's family. She knew Harry lived with his mother's sister. They'd eventually get the news, she's sure, that their loved one is dead. She imagines Harry's aunt breaking down into sobs on the floor, Harry's uncle punching a fist might through the wall and then going to eat food, Harry's cousin unaware and unsure and possibly on the verge of tears.

Veneda does this often. She knows the familiarity of death. It's all too real now, seeping into the corners of the Great Hall, lurking along the shadows in the corridors. Veneda has experienced death. She lost her whole family.

"Veneda." Professor Dumbledore told her again, "I need you to do something for me."

"Anything."

"All along I believed Lily dying to protect Harry was a fool proof way of Voldemort reaching his demise. I believe I may have been mistaken. Harry is now dead and it's almost sure that Voldemort will now reign."

She took in a sharp breath. How was this even possible? This was supposed to end happily.

"I am relatively sure is we ensure Lily and James remain alive, Voldemort will meet an earlier end." Dumbledore continues as he watches her closely, "But sir, what about the prophecy?" Veneda asks.

"Miss Phillips, do you honestly believe that all of the prophecies that lie in that hall come true. Or for the matter, are accurate? Certainly not."

Veneda stood there frozen, She didn't know what to say. Was Dumbledore really asking me to go back in time to save Lily and James Potter?

"Professor, what if I can't get back?" Veneda slowly asks as a wave of panic fills her body. Would she only end up knowing Ginny as a child? Would she even meet her parents?

"Well, Miss Phillips, you have nothing to lose. Your whole family is dead. I specifically picked you because of this." He snaps.

Veneda's mouth dropped open, although the tone of her professors voice wasn't ideal - it was true. She didn't have anyone left in the world. Her father killed off her whole family when Veneda's mum refused to support Voldemort and become a Death Eater, he went crazy. He was a real supporter of Voldemort. He wanted the world to be pure - like himself. Like the rest of Veneda's family and friends.

"You're vile, but it's true. So am I right to assume you are sending me back in time, to alter the past?" Veneda asks him yet another question. Veneda was confused, she didn't understand exactly what Dumbledore was asking of her.

Dumbledore smiles at her, his blue eyes twinkling.

"But sir, I thought all the Time-Turners had been destroyed the night Sirius died?"

Dumbledore let out a loud throaty laugh, "I know a spell."

Before Veneda could say a word, Dumbledore hushes her, "We have to be quick. Go upstairs and fetch things from your Dormitory that you will want to be bring with you. I have a note that you must give to my younger self and some gold for you to take with you. Meet me back here in fifteen minutes."

Veneda cocks her head to the side, "Don't I have time to say goodbye to everyone?"

Dumbledore shook his head at me, "I am afraid not. You must be quick, go get your things."

Veneda turns on the heel of her beautiful brown Mary Janes and races back towards the Gryffindor common room, eager to get her things before someone corners her. As Veneda steps into her dormitory she breathes in the smell of the room. The ashy smell of oak surrounds her body, making her feel safe.

Would she ever feel safe again? Would anybody?

She shakes her head and rummages under her bed and pulls out her small floral case. Opening it she piles everything she can think of into it - her books, a few clothes that she thought would be okay to wear in the seventies. She assumes she will be going to the seventies. She picks out a few skirts - both long and short, blouses, tops knee high socks, a few coats, bell bottoms (that her mother bought for her), floppy hats and a few pieces of jewelry.

She then grabs her small teddy bear keychain and her photo book that had multiple moving photos of her and her family and friends. She would need this. She didn't know how long she would be away from everyone. Even though her family no longer existed she would need her memories. She picks up her mothers bottle of perfume (she bought it before she went back to school, so that she could remember her mother's scent) and her older brother's t-shirts for pajamas.

She didn't bother bringing anything of her father's. He was a massive dick and rightfully belonged in Azkaban where hopefully he would rot.

Pulling out a quill and parchment she jots down a quick note to Ginny. Veneda hopes she finds it.

'_Dear Ginny,_

_I don't know how to explain this to you, but I am going back in time - to the seventies._

_I am going to save Harry's parents and Harry's life. Maybe I can save Remus and Sirius too? I have no idea what I am going to do and I am so incredibly scared. I want to make the future better for everyone, even if I end up sacrificing myself._

_I might never see you again but I want you to know that you are the bestest friend I've ever had. _

_I'm not going to say goodbye because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting._

_You've changed me forever and I'll never forget you. I am sorry about Harry. _

_Lots of love,_

_Veneda xx'_

Hastily she quickly folds up the note and writes in swirly letters 'Ginny' on the front. Veneda gingerly places the letter down on Ginny's bed in the hopes that she will come up here eventually.

Rubbing her sweaty palms on her jeans out of nervous habit she locks her suitcase and picks it up. Veneda glances one last time around her dormitory as she makes her way towards the stairs that lead back down to the common room.

Veneda skips down the steps running her hand along the banister and swinging her small suitcase around. Hogwarts was Veneda's home, how was she supposed to say goodbye to it? Technically she wasn't saying goodbye, she would be going to Hogwarts. Alas, it wasn't the same. There wouldn't be all the familiar faces that she had grown up with.

Veneda pushes open the door of the common room and steps through giving the fat lady a quick nod, "Thank you for everything. Goodbye."

The fat lady smiles back at her, returning the nod, "Goodbye."

Veneda quickly makes her way back to where she last saw Dumbledore but he is nowhere to be found, "Professor?" She calls out and then she spots Dumbledore inside the remains of a heavily disturbed classroom. Veneda trails in behind Dumbledore, "I'm ready." She announces to him and he turns around.

"I'll have to do it now, I need to be quick."

Dumbledore starts swishing his wand around and murmuring softly underneath his breath. Quickly he flicks his hand at Veneda. Instantly she begins to feel relaxed but then she realizes, "Wait! You never taught me the spell! How will I get back?"

Dumbledore opens his mouth to speak but the sound of feet running along the hallway grow louder and louder until Lucius Malfoy tears into the room.

He must of known Dumbledore would do this. Lucius Malfoy is a smart man.

"Stop her!" He tells his Death Eater friends and Veneda glances at her professor with a panicked expression on her face, "Professor! The spell! The fucking spell!"

But before Dumbledore can answer, Veneda lets out an almighty scream. Her body feels like it is on fire, I'm going to die she thought. Everything was beginning to cool down before the fireworks exploded before her eyes and she heard the sharp crack of an explosion before everything around her faded out.


End file.
